This Is Serious

A muse on strike. Who’s ever heard of this?

‘Listen, Dave…’
‘I’m not talking to you anymore. You took away my blog.’ He turns away.
‘Don’t you think I’m sad about my own blog?’
‘I don’t care.’

To be honest, I can hardly get over closing my Olde Arte Blogge. But I had no choice. The things I do currently are so different from what is on that blog now, I’m already running a secret blog in another corner of WP (well, two actually). And caring for Dave’s blog, even with only one post per month, took some time after all. OK, not much, but with ten blogs of my own, every minute is precious. So I reduced them to eight which is still a lot.

He’s struggling as I try to sit him onto my lap and hits me with his baseball bat.
‘Leave me! I don’t want this!’
‘Stay!’
‘No!’
‘Listen, …’
‘I’m a muse. I need a blog.’
‘But you can always write posts for this blog.’
‘I want a blog of my own. Or I’ll be on strike.’

I think we’ve might have got a wee problem here. He’s trying to blackmail me, obviously.

Shall I give in?

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It’s done!

I’ve finished the ‘Cocktail’ scarf!

Oh, eh, sorry. – Hi, Dave the Muse here.

Finally, I managed to finish the scarf project I told you about.

I only had to weave in the ends with a crochet hook.

It’s ready to be given to Ms J – I even found a leftover piece of gift wrap. Then I made a little label and wrapped the present.

I think I’ll give the knitting needles to her, too. If I should need them again, I could always borrow them.

Now I’m going to surprise Ms J.

DAVE

Surprise

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Oh! Hi! It’s you. How long have you been watching me?

Sorry, I didn’t notice you because I was too busy knitting.

I’ve already told you about this kit I found underneath the living room table. You can knit a fancy scarf from this one. Two meters long, garter stitch. Now there was an opportunity to get my hands on it and start making the scarf. My assistant is really busy at the moment and she won’t notice that the kit is no longer where she put it.

I’ll then give her the finished scarf as a surprise present. That’s the reason why I’m sitting here knitting.

Um, I’m sorry, but I’ve got to go on now. There’s still a little work to be done.

See you

DAVE

Knitting Dave – Pt. 2

It was a little tricky to get some of the accessories. But with the help of a certain ‘internet’ I could find almost everything I needed. Except for the green eyes. I had to change them to blue ones. There were green eyes available, but they were cat’s eyes. Too spooky even for a muse, we agreed.

From my stash:
some blue cotton yarn for the jeans
brown fancy knitting yarn for the hair

I bought:
two skeins of flesh-coloured sockwool (the last ones from the shop, already thinking of ‘plan B’ if I’d run out) and a white one (this would be ‘plan B’)
four skeins of black and three skeins of white yarn for the leather jacket and t-shirt (ample supply with some more projects in mind)
one skein of light yellow yarn for the baseball bat
a pair of red trainers (size 16 – 17 for babies, 0 – 3 months of age)
a pair of socks (for newborns)
a pair of blue glass eyes (14 mms)
a bag of stuffing material
a package of pipe cleaners

The internet sent me:
a pair of glasses

I did not have:
a plan

Neither did I have knitting instructions for a doll. But that didn’t stop me. Of course, there’s stuff on the internet. Alas, none of it looked like what I had in mind. Or rather, what we had. Never mind. Improvise.

I’m not an experienced knitter. OK, I can knit and purl and make little dolls, even a simple sweater if necessary. But I never did a project like this. I just picked up the needles and began knitting. That was the strange part of this project. It was almost like Dave knit himself. Very awkward.

As it turned out, I didn’t even need two skeins of skin-coloured wool. As I had no experience in knitting with sockwool, I overestimated the amount needed. I used up one skein with only a couple of meters left. – No, I’m not going to do a second one.

Notes to self DURING PROJECT:

Expedition to the craft shop. Buy eyes. Extend expedition to the toy shop. Buy trainers.

Make notes on knitting patterns. Take pictures for blog. Publish.

Make nose and ears. Mouth? Thinking of knitting a neck. Shall I?

Next would be the body. But I’m not quite sure if there’s enough skin-coloured yarn. It says on the label one skein will make a pair of socks size 46 (10). I hope they don’t refer to sneaker socks … Or should I choose white for the body? Like he’s in his undies?

Arms and legs. I’m thinking of hands with at least a thumb to make him able to hold things. Stuff them with pipe cleaners? I think I saw bendable hands on a manufacturer’s website. Size? And bendable metal strips for the legs. Hmm. Feet to fit the shoes. Need a sock pattern. Try out boomerang heel pattern. Buy socks?

A pair of jeans (easy) and a t-shirt (opening in the back to get head through neckhole?). The leather jacket. Problem: the zip fastener has to be separabel. Sold from 30 cm length upwards. But the internet has got a solution: accessories for doll clothing. Sold from 10 cm upwards. Make jacket first, then order zipper.

Crochet baseball bat. Stuff firmly. For the ‘bang’ factor.

Sew on hair. From hairline to inside?

Don’t forget scarf. Scarves are cool.

And don’t get intimidated by the fear of endless discussions with Dave. They will happen. Bet your granny.

So, there he is, sitting in ‘his’ corner of the sofa which he will inhabit from now on.

– (reproachful) You messed up knitting my feet! They’re way too small! –
I did, that’s true. Obviously I misread the pattern. But you’re not supposed to run around anyway.
– I, um … –
But you seem to enjoy your knitted version anyway. Are you going to come out of your new body again?
– No. –
But does The Guild allow this? What if they find out?
– You don’t have to tell them. –
Ah, so they don’t allow. Interesting.
– Weeeelllll, eh … –
I’ll keep that in mind. Just in case.

Knitting Dave – Pt. 1

Dave the Muse – never lets go of his beloved baseball bat

As you already know by now, Dave, my muse, had insisted on becoming visible. To avoid being hit with his baseball bat, I had no choice but to pick up the needles and knit him.

Making Dave, I started with the glasses. Yup. You see, he wanted a pair of glasses. For the cool look. There was only this one model for sale. So their size determined the size of my muse’s head. I even made a tension sample this time.

The body is simply knit in the round on dpns. I found a pattern for a pair of teddy bear trousers which I used for the lower part of the body as well as for the jeans. Then I knitted the feet according to a sock pattern I found. They had to fit the little pair of trainers, of course.

For the arms I used a provisional cast-on and knit from top down to the hands. Then I unpicked the provisional cast on and knit another heel from the sock pattern for the shoulders.

Have you ever knit a nose? Nor me. It knitted itself. Seriously. I was only holding the dpns.

Maybe the way I went to work is a little unusual, faithful reader. Decide for yourself.

Because of some limitations in the material available, I couldn’t knit Dave exactly like he first suggested. Of course, this led to some discussion. Here are a few examples.

Green eyes. I wanted green eyes. Not blue ones. –
They don’t sell them anymore. Only green cat eyes. These are a little spooky even for a doll, don’t you think?
– OK, I have to admit that. –

Eek, what kind of hair is this? I look like a squirrel. –
Wild hair, as requested. I couldn’t get some other fancy knitting yarn during the summer, so I had to take some from my stash. Or would you rather be bald?
– Nooo, but … –
Of course, I could make one of those silly base ball hats for you to cover it.
– Don’t. –

– Where’s the scruff? –
Well, I’ve got some matching yarn in my stash, but using this will make a proper beard. Are you sure you want one?
– Hm. I’ll think about that. Maybe later. –

I still need to finish his jacket and sew the cool scarf.

Read more in Knitting Dave – Pt. 2 soon.

Re-organizing The Boudoir

We left The Boudoir in a state of being ‘slightly unorganized’. After Dave had been complaining, I had to do some cleaning up.

It’s now a couple of weeks later. I have taken half of the things out of The Boudoir now and spread them all across the rest of my little flat wherever there was a little space left. My vacuum cleaner is working overtime. Because of all that dust I had to wipe my glasses repeatedly. I’m taking a little break now. The new quilting magazine has just arrived.

But I feel slightly distracted. There are strange noises coming from the direction of The Boudoir.

???

(noises continue, sounding like someone is opening and closing drawers and boxes, searching through plastic bags etc., mumbling to himself)

What is going on there? I’m going to take a look. (walks over to The Boudoir)

Oh no.

DAVE?
– Hi! –
What are you doing there?
– I’m looking for inspiration. –
If I’m not totally wrong, you have found some already. –
– (he purrs happily) –

As it says on the tin: textile surprises from the bedroom. And what a textile surprise he is.

My muse is using the knitted image of himself as an actual body. What a little knave! I knew he was into something when he asked me to knit him.