The Freelancer

– Hello! Dave here. –
Here to inspire me.
– Exactly. –
Before you do so, I’d love to know something. Tell me, how did you come to me in the first place? Is there an organization or society or maybe something like a muse agency who sent you?
– No, it’s a guild. The Muses’ Guild. There’s only a limited number of members. If a person dies and their muse is no longer needed, they get assigned to a new person. The committee decides who will get a muse. In some very rare cases, when it turns out that people don’t deserve their muse, they are called back. Muses live much longer than people, but we are not immortal. Only if a muse dies, a new member is admitted into the Guild. We have to pass a complicated test, only the best get on the list of possible members. The others who passed the test are allowed to go freelance, though. –
And you …
– I passed. –
Oh, I see. A freelance muse. May I ask, is this your first job?
– Yes, it is. –
So you’re a kind of apprentice muse?
– If you want. –
That explains something.
– What do you mean? –
Nothing, forget it. How did you find me?
– You were on the Guild’s list of possible candidates. –
Or victims.
– What? –
Nothing. –

Are you one of the people who haven’t got a muse yet? I think it would be a great idea if you adopt one. As mentioned above, there are some freelancers available. You don’t have to pick someone like Dave, though. A normal one would do for a start.

– What? –

Oh, I almost forgot, what have you got for me today?
– Eh, I think, some sample pieces of decorative machine stitching. Using the batik swatches from Africa. –
Good idea.


This Site Is Muse-protected

This morning I was sitting in The Boudoir working on something from my vast collection of UFOs. I had put some of my favourite music into the CD player – The Ultimate Collection by the Brian Setzer Orchestra.
Suddenly I heard a familiar voice.
– Hi! Dave here! Hey, cool music. One of my favourites! (begins to sing along) –
I didn’t know you sing.
– Of course I do. I’m a muse! (sings on) –

‘If you keep on sinning
I’ll just take another pinning
You’re my Hoodoo Voodoo Doll’

– Which reminds me. Pinterest. Any news? –
Some deleted their entries after I contacted them. Then someone had the face to repin from my own account only minutes after I repinned my own work. That was one too many. I sent a copyright complaint to Pinterest straightaway. A long list, but it seems the pins and repins are all gone now.
– (disappointed) Oh. You know, I’ve had an idea. A Pinterest pincushion in the shape of a voodoo doll. With a swag bag. No need for one now, I suppose. –
Not at the moment, no. But if this issue comes up again, I’m ready as I wanted to make one anyway. And I told people that this site is muse-protected and this seems to work.
– He-he! – And off he goes.

Phew! Nothing’s worse than a bad-tempered muse.